Friday, September 25, 2015

As His Batshit Chickens Come Home To Roost. Again.

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It seems that, once again, the Pig People are starting to make it over the razor-wire surrounding the gated compound where David Brooks and his Beltway pals live and work and make up funny stories about the antics of imaginary hippies for the amusement of their wealth patrons.

But this time, the Pig People aren't breaching their defenses in onesies and twosies, but are pouring in by the thousands right through the main gate (apparently the compound guards can be completely flummoxed if you show up wearing both an "I Heart Reagan" tee-shirt and a Donald Trump hat.)

And so, as the leader of the Beltway syndicate, Mr. Brooks has been forced to once again implement the Village's emergency inner-perimeter defense protocol in which they all scramble down into a hidey-hole while Mr. Brooks pens a sternly worded editorial rewriting the Story of Modern Conservatism and disavowing all responsibility for the lunatics who are overrunning the place.

Regular readers will note that this is not the first or even the 51st time Mr. Brooks has broken out the wingnut whitewash to remake the depraved history of the movement and the political party to which he owes  every nickle of his personal wealth and every erg of his Beltway privilege.  For example, way back in 2011, one long-forgotten knave wrote this...
A certain member of the GOP's chickenshit Brain Caste has the fucking nerve to feign surprise.

Here is the key paragraph from David Brooks' latest 800-word embarrassment:
"But we can have no confidence that the Republicans will seize this opportunity. That’s because the Republican Party may no longer be a normal party. Over the past few years, it has been infected by a faction that is more of a psychological protest than a practical, governing alternative."
Here is how it would have read if David Brooks had a shred of honesty:
But we can have no confidence that the Republicans will seize this opportunity. That’s because the Republican Party may no longer be a normal party. Over the past few years, Over the past 40 years, it has been infected by a faction that is more of a psychological protest than a practical, governing alternative.
The first version -- favored by every professional Beltway ball-washer in the media -- permits the David Brookses of the world to continue to play the role of the reasonable, detached witness, merely Observing-With-Alarm the final stages of the complete and completely unforeseeable (No one could have predicted...!) psychotic implosion of his Republican Party.

The second version -- the honest version -- puts Our Mr. Brooks (and the rest of his ilk) at the scene of the crime, squarely behind the wheel and driving the getaway car for the Party of God for virtually his entire adult life.

So while much of the rest of what Our Mr. Brooks has written is perfectly true
"The members of this movement do not accept the logic of compromise, no matter how sweet the terms. If you ask them to raise taxes by an inch in order to cut government by a foot, they will say no.
..."
The question remains, where were you, Mr. Brooks, when Reagan was instructing them that the government is always wrong, always evil? Where were you when the leaders of your Movement were teaching them that everyone not in the Movement was a Commie? That compromise was treason?
"The members of this movement do not accept the legitimacy of scholars and intellectual authorities."
Yes, but where were you, Mr. Brooks, when the yahoo, bigot, militia-nuts and Fundy votes were being aggressively courted by your Party?...

And so we return now to the present day and find the actual history of American Conservationism once again trying to claw its way out of the memory hole where Mr. Brooks keeps trying to bury it. Which is why no one should be terribly surprised that Mr. Brooks has once again raided the limitless larder of his own personal dishonesty for another couple of bags of quick-drying Beltway feelgood with which to wall the monster back up for a little which longer.

Today's happy-clappy fairy tale begins one sunny afternoon a million years ago when God, Alexander Hamilton and Abraham Lincoln invented American Conservatism.  And from then until now, everything has been humming along just perfectly...
American free market and religious conservatives have traditionally embraced a style of nationalism that is hopeful and future minded. From Lincoln to Reagan to Bush, the market has been embraced for being dynamic and progressive.
Until suddenly, during the second term of George W. Bush...
During George W. Bush’s first term there wasn’t much difference between how Democrats and Republicans viewed the overall immigration levels.
...a Very Bad Thing happened.

Sadly, even the greatest minds of the Beltway cannot explain why the Very Bad Thing happened but suddenly and with absolutely no warning, people like Ann Coulter are ruining everything:
These commentators and candidates look backward to an America that is being lost. Ann Coulter encapsulated this attitude perfectly in her latest book title, “Adios, America.” This is the philosophy of the receding roar, the mourning for an America that once was and is now being destroyed by foreign people and ideas.
And, suddenly and inexplicably, the leading Republican candidates for president are goggle-eyed buffoons and demagogues:
Out of this backward- and inward-looking mentality comes a desire to exclude. Donald Trump talks falsely and harshly about Hispanic immigrants. Ben Carson says he couldn’t advocate putting “a Muslim in charge of this nation.”
Sigh.

Conservative public intellectuals like David Brooks have lovingly nurtured the monsters which have been growing in the belly of the GOP for thirty years.  The money was great, the perks were outstanding and what could be more fun for a Conservative social-climber like Brooks than punching hippies while pimping war for George W. Bush.

Living the dream, baby!

But now that the party is over, the booze is gone, hard light of day is roaring through the holes in the wall, and the bill for the orgy has come due, we find Conservative fair-weather heroes like Mr, Humility trying to sneak out the doggy door.

Now that the ogre babies have finally hatched out and are eating their host alive, their mommies and daddies are disowning them and calling them cruel names in the newspaper.



How very sad.

1 comment:

trgahan said...

“American free market and religious conservatives have traditionally embraced a style of nationalism that is hopeful and future minded...”

From their actions, conservative’s future minded hope is an America economically pre-New Deal (rich white guy ALWAYS gets what he wants), socially pre-Progressive Era (Rich white guys says who else gets what), like in the 1950’s spending your Saturday nights beating up minorities on THEIR side of town until the cops told you to go home (a favored pastime of many an “Uncle Liberty” where I grew up before 1968) and Liberals couldn't say a fucking word about anything without facing jail time.